"I always lie!"
(my favorite paradox)

9/03/2010

Life and Death


I’ve been thinking about life and death lately. I think it is a little bit weird of thinking about death. I mean, I’m only 22, but I feel like, I’m going out of life, rather then getting it started. I was always thinking about marriage like it is the begging of the last part of my life, because after that, the only thing that comes, is raise children, and death. Working so I have money, to keep my family. I don’t know why, but a little bit marriage was a not so pleasant idea in the past. But now days, I find myself whishing to get married, to find a girl, I can trust that much, I marry her, and be with her, share my life with her. This thinking also triggered my ideas of death. Well, I’m not religious, so I don’t believe in heaven or hell. I find reincarnation a pleasant taught, but I don’t know the truth. Everybody tries to figure out, what is going to be after we die. I mean, if we assume that, we made of tree parts, the body, the mind, and the spirit or soul, there are several path where these ends up after our heart stopped beating. We know that our body is going to underground to rot or it is getting burned along with our mind. But the big question is the soul. Well this side of the question needs further examination.

First of all, let see, if there is really a part of us, what we call soul. I have double thoughts of that. One is yes, we do, and the other we don’t. If we do, I cannot understand that, how Is that possible, that it can take up so much pain. I mean, if our body, gets a lot of pain, it brakes, or bleeds, stops functioning properly. If we get a lot of stress, or head trauma, our mind gets damaged, we can have so many mental illnesses. What about the soul? No matter how much people hearts our feelings, it just keeps hurting, doesn’t goes into a shock, or coma, so we don’t feel the pain any more, like our body, or it doesn’t develops an other soul, so it can lock up all the pain, like our mind. It have no illnesses, no defense, nothing. We just can feel, there is something not right inside of us, but it has nothing to do to our body, or mind. So there has to be something else after all. This part I have to think more, but let’s assume we have a soul, and get back to the death question.

What happens to our soul after our body died. Does it dies with it? Or it can leave further without it? I say, let’s examine this question from a different view. Where all of our parts come from? We all know how our mind and body develops. But what about our soul? Is it existed before our body, and just occupied it, and doing so made it livable? This would rectify the reincarnation theory. Which is good, I would like to live more lives, see what brings the future.

What if our soul, is not existed before our body, but it is borne with it? Now Catholics would say, we got it from god. I don’t think so, but no matter right now. If it wasn’t before our body, then why would it be after that? In that case, after we died, everything is going just like before we was borne. When I was younger, I remember I didn’t wanted to die, because I thought being dead is boring, and I hate being bored. Now I know it won’t be boring, because I do not remember being bored before I was borne. The only thing, I don’t want to die right now is curiosity. I want to know, what would people think of me when I’m gone, and where the technology is developing after my death. I wish I could just hang around us a ghost and see everything. Now you probably asking, do I believe in ghosts? Well if I assume, that ghosts are the souls of dead people, and I think the soul dies with the body, I should say no. But I cannot know, that for sure, so I keep an open mind. I even can accept if heaven exist, I just not believe it does. But if somebody would come back from there and tell me it does, I would believe him/her.

These are the thoughts that occupies my mind lately. I think I will find out which one is true, when I get there. Until then I keep grinding my ideas about all, finding more reasons for and against of them. I will let you know if I came up some more thoughts.

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